Working on a Dream




Friday, January 28, 2011

I am Numb

I am numb

My feelings have left me
I think they were stolen away
While on my knee

I am numb

In my house it is grey
Greyer than the January skies
In my mind,
No happiness, no worries
Only sighs

I am numb

Nine months we waited for you
We walk around and ask
How can this be true?”

I am numb

Walking to the mail-box in the cold snow,
Only makes me feel even more low

I am numb

There are no cries in this hollow place
Only wandering & searching
I need a touch from God
Right now I am in need of Your grace

I am numb

Anthony you don’t dare ask God, Why?
Isn’t it better sometimes…
If you’d just believe an ugly lie?

But there is only one stinging reality as I sit to write-

My angel baby isn’t here.
Isn't that right?

Yes, I am numb-
Not a single feeling
I have not one



Anonymous said...

Oh Anthony, This just makes me so sad, I can almost feel your heartache... you and Christen just hang on to the Grace of God, he knows how you are feeling. I am praying for some peace for you and your beautiful wife, I'm sure it will come.

Anonymous said...

My heart breaks for you both. I will prayer for you both to find peace and comfort knowing that your sweet angel is in his hands.

Jenny said...

My husband and I lost our 13 day old daughter on 1/5.. so much of what you wrote holds true for us too, I feel it all echo in my heart.

I am so sorry for your loss. I don't know what else to say, and I don't think there is anything that can be said. Just know you aren't alone, and that there are others thinking of you, and in similar spots as you.

~Melissa~ said...

Continually praying for both of you. I can't even imagine the pain that you feel but I know our God is bigger than anything we could dream of and I know that if you hold strongly to Him, He will give you all that you need. Your little angel is touching hearts all around the world... as is you and Christen's lives. God... sustain this couple, bring them joy, heal their hearts and may you continue to be glorified in their lives.

Anonymous said...

This poem is great!