Working on a Dream




Monday, September 16, 2013

Why do you have a problem with EVERYONE?

When you have a problem with EVERYone; everyone is NOT the problem ...You are. 

John Maxwell, in his interesting book, Winning with People, shares a principle worth repeating here in Working on a Dream.   He introduces us to a person he calls Bob.   

Bob actually has an entire chapter dedicated to him. 
The reason is because Bob has a problem with EVERYONE!

Bob's first problem is that he is a problem carrier.  Like a single chirping cricket that sits right outside your bedroom window, Bob loves to carry his problems around and use the world as his sounding board.  Sadly, this is only the beginning of Bob's troubles.

See, Bob is also a problem finder.  
You can find Bob criticizing people after events, because Bob never helps with them. Because of this, he reasons to himself that he is at liberty to mouth off; nitpicking what didn't work or what should have been.  Which translates into what Bob really likes; creating problems.  Let's face it, Bob is a major tool.  He sits back, frozen in his fear and just watches.  Never getting into the game, he stammers on the sidelines of life all the while searching with his critical eye. 

I have heard that we all carry two buckets in life. One filled with water and one filled with gasoline.  We can choose to either put out a fire with the water or douse gas on a situation and make it worse. People like Bob come equipped with 5 gallons of gas in one hand and a lighter in the other.

Finally, Bob is a problem receiver.   Misery loves company; birds of a feather flock together and so on.  The bottom line is that the Bob's of the world attract other Bob's.  So if you happen to stumble across a Bob, I'd suggest scraming before his fellow minions show up to ruin your day. 

Question: Are you Bob? 
Are you a problem Carrier?
A problem Finder? 
A problem Creator?
Or a problem Receiver?

Take some time to reflect on your life.  
If you where to ask those closest to you, would they say that you fit the above description? Going through life as Bob is no fun and will cost you a lot. The good news is that you can start making some changes in your life and turn things around! Lincoln wisley said, “We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.” 
Here is a suggestion; start with finding ways to compliment others.  I make it a rule to complement at least 3 people every day.  This has trained me to look for the positive in others.  If you have a better way, then great.  The point is making a plan that will get you to stop being that "guy" we all like to call Bob. 

No comments: