Anthony has a Nickname??

Have you ever had a nickname?

Not the nice ones either.  You know the kind that I am referencing here.  The ones that made you avoid walking down a certain hallway in school because so-and-so was standing at the end of it; waiting to unleash the new thought provoking title in a very loud manner. In front of EVERYBODY. Simultaneously humiliating you and enraging you... Don't worry, I have had that happen to me too once or twice in my life. 

Nicknames are not always a bad thing, all of us have known a "scooter" or "slick" at one point in our lives.  Nicknames can actually reveal a lot about a person if you think about it. Pastor Craig Groeshel teaches that how a person addresses you will reveal how well they know you.  I think he is right.
Let me illustrate:

Let's pretend you are at dinner with me and we are waiting to be seated.  10 minutes passes and then you hear the server announce, "Klll U Deet US Party of 3."  Two things will go through your mind (1) Anthony you have a really messed-up last name and (2) the server absolutely does not know Anthony Kladitis.

Let's take this a step further. If you call me "Mr. Kladitis" or "Pastor Anthony" the chances are that you know me, but you are not that close to me.  You know of me, but the intimate details of my life are not on your radar.

Along the line there will be the people that call me, Anthony. Most people call me Anthony (at least to my face) and this tells me that we are, generally speaking, close.  At least closer relationally than the above groups.

But then there is this other group, the mysterious category of people that call me by a nickname: "Anth" or "Ant."  If you call me this, then this means we are tight. We have stories -scratch that- we share stories.  Private ones. One's that date us back years.

Here is a rule that I just made up: The way that you address someone will change according to your relationship with them. Take for example your spouse. When you are introduced by your spouse, they refer to you as their husband or wife.  I have never witnessed a wife walk up to her friends and say, "Hello!  I would like you all to meet Dr. John Wilson."  But I have experienced on several occasions a wife introducing her spouse the following way, "Everybody, I would like you to meet my husband, John Wilson."  The wife introduced her husband according to her relationship with her husband.

The names people call you reveal something about their relationship with you and it is no different with God. [The God-Bomb. You knew it was coming, it was only a matter of time].
David said, "Those who know your name will trust in you."
Let me ask you, How do you address God? 
-Saviour?
-Lord of all Creation?
-King?
-Friend?
-Father?

What do you call God? Do you feel close enough to call him Friend? Do you have in mind a distant Father?
Jesus had a nickname for God. It was something that a little child would call his father, "Abba."
Abba, translated into English simply means Daddy and was used by infants. Jesus was 30 years old and still called His Father Abba.  Let me ask you a question, Do you still call your mother and father by the same title today that you did when you were 3?
I thought not.
Jesus did.

It's pretty amazing what the nicknames people closest to someone will call them.
Isn't it?

Anthony, I Still Remember: A poem dedicated to my son.

Anthony, I still remember. 

Anthony, I still remember, 

As the middle of January is always tender,

Yesterday was January the tenth,

A day for me that still does not make any sense.

I laid in bed late last night and wondered to myself silently,

What life would of been like if you had pulled through,

But the emptiness reminded me that was too good to be true.

Another birthday gone by, 

There wasn’t a single card, call, or contact; 

No-one remembered to wish happy birthday to you, 

No one even tried.

Anthony, I know you are out of most people’s minds,

As January 2011 seems like ages ago,

But one person that holds you close is your daddy; 

Understand that I will not let you go.

Son, I still remember. 

And I will always wonder, 

Always asking, “Why?” 

Having to trust in God’s plans before I trust I.

Anthony.

I still remember.

And I know that some others still do, too. 

Because you left a mark etched in our hearts, 

That time will never erase anytime soon.

_____

This poem is dedicated to Anthony Christopher. 
When inspired, I try to put in words something that cannot be described with human language.
His short life altered mine in such a way that is indescribable. 

ANGER: Why are you still carrying her?

A senior monk and a junior monk were traveling together. At one point, they came to a river with a strong current. As the monks were preparing to cross the river, they saw a very young and beautiful woman also attempting to cross. The young woman asked if they could help her cross to the other side.

The two monks glanced at one another because they had taken vows not to touch a woman.

Then, without a word, the older monk picked up the woman, carried her across the river, placed her gently on the other side, and carried on his 
journey.

The younger monk couldn’t believe what had just happened. After rejoining his companion, he was speechless, and an hour passed without a word between them.

Two more hours passed, then three, finally the younger monk could contain himself any longer, and blurted out “As monks, we are not permitted a woman, how could you then carry that woman on your shoulders?”

The older monk looked at him and replied, “Brother, I set her down on the other side of the river, why are you still carrying her?”

____________

Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.

Mark Twain

Anthony weigh's in:  

Life will have plenty of opportunities for anger.  

The tricky part about anger is that it is a  God-given emotion.  Jesus got angry, but His anger was a righteous anger.  I don't want to sound pious, but His anger was healthy, and your anger could be too.

The point of today's post is not that you shouldn't get angry, rather, anger can and will destroy you over time if left unchecked. It has a way of blinding you, isolating you, and spilling over to every area of your life. 

I have heard it said, "If you don't heal what hurt you, you will bleed on people who didn't cut you."  And that's unfair to those that love you...

Reflect:  What are you carrying around that you should let go of?

How to Handle Life's Disappointments?

What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up like a raisin in the sun?
-Langston Hughes, Harlem.

Harold S. Kushner, in his fascinating book, "Overcoming Life's Disappointments" comments on the poem asking, "In these lines, the poet wonders what happens to dreams that do not come true. I wonder what happens to the dreamer. How do people cope with the realization that important dimensions of their lives will not turn out as they hoped they would ..." 
Heavy Stuff.
Especially if you are in touch with reality.



The first thing to grapple with is that you will be disappointed. For most of us, we have already experienced our share. But, there was a time, perhaps when young(er) and naive, you happened to dance around the painful events of life unscathed. Then, it got you. Setbacks, losses, unexpected events.
You were wounded on the inside. Never to be the same again. And NO, your life will not be as it once was. I am a victim of this mentality -waiting for things to return to "normal" - they do not. As a man of deep nostalgia, I stood at this doorstep for years, only to have that door unanswered. So I get it, trust me.

As time passed on, you learned that the question was not, "How do I go through life avoiding disappointment?" Rather, "How will I respond to those disappointments?" Today I was reading in the Psalms something that I know was a message for me:

"Light arises in the darkness for the upright" (112:4)

When your heart has broken and you feel lost a lot of the time you feel like you are groping for something. Whether it is the past, restoration or a specific answer, you grope. You yearn like a blind man for answers around you. In our Psalm, we read something that shifts our mind to a different perspective. "Light arises in the darkness!" Your answer will come. Your restoration is on its way. God is not done with you. Your journey, although confusing, painful and down right exhausting can produce something of value.

The Space Between

Between stimulus and response there is a space.
In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response.
In those choices lie our growth and our happiness.
-Stephen Covey, The 8th Habit. 

STIMULUS and RESPONSE. 

The space between whatever happens to you and your response to it - therein lies your destiny.

A person says something that rubs you the wrong way...
A friend texts you something that crosses you...
A loved one acts in a way that frustrates you...

No matter what has happened to you, is now happening, or will happen to you in the future, there is a space between those things and your response to them.  Some people's spaces -for whatever reason- are large, others are small.  This does not mean it has to always be this way, however. 

Awareness brings a sense of power; now you have the ability to change.

You have the freedom to choose. 

Have you ever thought about your freedom?

At birth you were given dormant seeds that lay inside of you. Ready for cultivation. 

Seeds that lay ready for the daybreak.  There remains inside of you infinite capabilities.
Author Marianne Williamson wrote a captivating piece about our dormant potential that is worth printing out and keeping on your mirror.  

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. 
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. 
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us. 

We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be? 
You are a child of God. 

Your playing small 
Does not serve the world. 
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking 
So that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, 
As children do. 
We were born to make manifest 
The glory of God that is within us. 

It's not just in some of us; 
It's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, 
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. 
As we're liberated from our own fear, 
Our presence automatically liberates others.

STIMULUS and RESPONSE.

You have the power of choice.

You can change the direction of your life.

You can change your future.

YOU.  

CAN CHANGE.

BY.

BECOMING AWARE of the space between whatever happens to you and your response to it.

Therein lies your destiny.